"Then the guilt from my ignored responsibilities grows so large that merely carrying it around with me feels like a huge responsibility. It takes up a sizable portion of my capacity, leaving me almost completely useless for anything other than consuming nachos and surfing the internet like an attention-deficient squirrel on PCP."
"An award for everyone who manages to work and email and take care of kids and not kill their plants" - Thank you Hyperbole and a Half! I am successful! (Although I'm substituting a dog for the kids part)