When I'm feeling tension or pain, I am training myself to in that moment ask myself "what is this teaching you? what are you here to learn?" Then the pain becomes the good kind - the kind that makes your muscles stronger or boosts stamina, instead of the kind that brings you down and tears you apart.
Flies in the face of "bear each others' burdens" as Christ bore our burdens. Being positive 100% of the time is delusional. People have issues, negative issues, and solutions need to be discussed. By knowing of something negative in another person's life is the only way you can problem solve a bad situation in their life. Once a person has resolved a negative life issue with you having helped them, now that's positive!