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"You know, I have one simple request and that is to have sharks with frickin' laser beams attached to their heads. Now evidently my cycloptic colleague informs me that that cannot be done..would you remind me what I pay you people for, honestly? Throw me a bone here!"

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Funny drunk fails - http://jokideo.com/funny-drunk-fails/

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I hate when people say you don't need alcohol to have fun. I don't need running shoes to run but it helps.

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And a big steak. Yep go fuck yourself! #dontforgetwine

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Wicked-Naughty-Diva, crazylikemrfox: babesbaconandbooze: ...

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http://overtbuzz.com/937/3/10-funniest-memes-on-alcoholism

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Must be Alice's friends. Um, no. That last post wasn't telling you to get rid of anything of mine. Stop trying to inch your way into my hustle. THANK YOU.

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These Are Funny Because They Are Absolutely True! - 27 Pics

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I hate when people say you don't need, alcohol to have fun,you don't need running shoes to run,but it fucken helps,humor,aa, drink up,drink drank drunk,meme

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