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"I think if cops yelled out "Mannequin Challenge!" Instead of "Freeze!" They'd have better results. "

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"*History class in 2100* Teacher: So, we've finished 2015. On to 2017! Students: But what about 2016- Teacher: We don't talk about 2016..."

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"The little kid next door just opened his window and yelled,"what is 27 plus 4?"and I yelled back, "its 31" and he said,"Thank you god". I'm dying!"

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""Always be positive!" *Trips down stairs* Me: Woo, I got down those stairs fast!"

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"I know I wasn't the only weirdo teenager who used to practice their signature in case they got famous. "

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"I always control my breathing when walking up a flight of stairs so I don't seem unfit... Then I go around the corner and die "

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""I like my coffee how I like myself: Dark, bitter, and too hot for you.""

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"6 am: tired 9 am: tired 1 pm: tired 3 pm: tired 5 pm: tired 7 pm: tired 9 pm: tired Bed Time: ENERGY "

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"I'm not fat but I'm not skinny either I'm at the point where you can definitely tell I like Chicken Nuggets"

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"Reminder to self: Just because you can stay up until 5 in the morning doesn't mean you should"

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